I was negotiating the suffocatingly crowded Wrigley Field concourse during the second rain delay on this beautiful Opening Day 2008 when I brushed past a guy who had just exited the rest-room.  “I thought I was gonna die in there,” he said to his friend, and neither one laughed.

The Cubs home opener against Milwaukee was delayed almost an hour by rain and then the tarp came back out in the third inning as a slight drizzle turned serious.  The first delay gave fans extra bar time before opening pitch, and the second had them scurrying, bladders full, into the bowels of the 94-year-old ballpark.  The ensuing restroom jam had many considering whether it’d be preferable to pee their pants rather than fight their way to the Wrigley troughs. 

I’m exaggerating, but only a little.  I ran into a friend mid-game and he said one of his crew ran across the street to Bernie’s during the delay, peed there, and then scalped a ticket to re-enter.  A few in our group simply left, disgusted by the 30-45 minute wait to piss, on top of the rain and cold, and gathered at the Gingerman Tavern up the block. 

I know, sounds like fun doesn’t it?  (Here’re some photos from the day:    http://www.flickr.com/photos/fansherpa/2383136730/in/set-72157600217855545/)  I want to thank the Cubs and MLB for giving us the March 31^st opener, pretty much guaranteeing crappy weather.  Sure, it could be chilly and rainy any time in April as well, but the powers-at-be weren’t doing fans any favors by scheduling this season-opening home-stand in Chicago.

The truth is we did have fun, but it had little to do with baseball.  Not sure if that’s MLB’s goal but it’s often reality in Chicago on Opening Day, when the weather makes enjoying baseball an impossibility.  We gathered at our usual spot in the back of Murphy’s Bleachers for $5 cans of brew, but soon moved on as the area is uncovered and the rain was coming down hard.  We went up the block to Nisei Lounge (http://www.fansherpa.com/Wrigley%20Field/eatdrink/90), a crusty old place where the beers were cheaper, the crowd thinner and the urinals overflowing.  Unpleasant bathroom experiences seemed to be the theme of the day.

After a few beers we noticed the rain had stopped and the TVs showed the tarp was coming off, so we drank up and headed in.  We settled in by the opening pitch, the rain temporarily gone and the temperatures cool but not frigid.  Not bad for opening day.  It’s been much worse.

Not surprisingly, Carlos Zambrano and Ben Sheets were mowing down hitters, so there was little early action, at least not on the field.  A couple of fans in the left-field bleachers who obviously took great advantage of that extra bar time tumbled into the basket atop the wall.  One of them hopped right out but the other struggled and had to be pulled up by other fans, and lost a shoe in the process.  An usher dashed out and picked it up, taking it back with him.  Must have sucked to be that fan when the rain really started coming down an inning later.

Unlike many others I stuck it out through the delay, although I must admit to having thoughts of calling it a day.  Standing in the packed concourse, not knowing when the tarp might come off and if more rain was on the way, jeans, jacket, gloves, Cubs hat, already soaked through, I wondered if it was all worth it.  This is what it has come to for the Wrigley opener.  Our usual crew of about 15 or so has dwindled to less than 10, and while family and work obligations play a role, it’s really more about the weather.  Friends who are non-Cub fans but used to the make the trip for the experience no longer do so.  And I can’t really blame them.  Why spend the money to fly to Chicago and burn a vacation day, as well as a chit with the wife, to freeze your nuts off for a team you have no allegiance to?  Especially when you can come back any time in the summer and take in a game in shorts and a t-shirt? 

We were actually scrambling to find folks to go and for the first time ever had extras to scalp.  My friend Todd took care of that, after which he realized in divvying up the tickets he’d failed to leave one for himself.  So he went back to the scalpers and got one for himself.  It wasn’t a tough proposition on this day.

Anyway, my seatmates had bolted for the Gingerman, so when play resumed I called Todd in the upper deck and told him to come down, plenty of seats open up the right-field line, right down near the field, within shouting distance of Fukudome.  So he and another friend came down and we watched as Zambrano and Sheets continued the dueling shut-outs, and the rain resumed.  Fukudome, playing his first regular season game as a Cub and on U.S. soil, and wearing Jose Cardenal’s #1, provided the only action for the Cubs all day, doubling on the first pitch he saw, later singling and drawing a walk, and much later hitting a 3-run homer in the bottom of the ninth to tie the game after Kerry Wood gave up three in the top half of the inning.

Yes, that Kerry Wood.  Back after the miracle healing on his arm last summer, Wood earned the closer’s job in spring training and promptly entered Monday’s game and beaned a guy with his first pitch.  You can’t make this stuff up.  He then gave up three runs, and was saved only when Milwaukee brought in Eric Gagne, who clearly should not be pitching in the Major Leagues.  Gagne gave up the 3-run shot to Fukudome, who in four hours went from a complete mystery to the most popular player in the history of the franchise (http://chicago.cubs.mlb.com/news/article.jsp?ymd=20080401&content_id=2478648&vkey=news_chc&fext=.jsp&c_id=chc).

Wood and Gagne were in a contest to see who had the worst former phenom pitcher, and it ended in a tie.  Bob Howry, another alleged vital cog in the Cubs’ ’08 relief corps, came in for the 10^th and gave up the winning run, Brew Crew 4-3.

By then I too had retired to the Gingerman, where it was warm and dry and the beer and shots of Sambuca (not the smartest choice) were flowing, served up at the back bar by a young woman in a tight t-shirt that read ‘Ponies are Pretty.’  Hmmm?  We three final hold-outs took off when Wood gave up the runs in the top of the ninth.  The game was on at the packed Gingerman – clearly there were more people in Wrigleyville bars at this point than in Wrigley Field – and the place erupted at Fukudome’s shot. 

It was more subdued as the Brewers scored in the 10^th and the Cubs could not respond, but it’s not like people were cursing and smashing chairs or anything.  Yet again, baseball had taken a backseat on Opening Day, so I thought I’d try to rouse some folks.

“The Cubs are in second place!” I shouted to no one in particular.  I think one guy chuckled.  Otherwise there was a debate over what pussy ordered a pitcher of Blue Moon and oh yea, what does ‘Ponies are Pretty’ mean anyway?                              

I still love Opening Day.

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Andy Buchanan is the principal writer and editor for Wise Guides and Fan Sherpa after spending several years as a journalist working for the Associated Press, Chicago Tribune and other outlets. When not reporting, he was often at Wrigley Field watching the Cubs or planning his next visit to a ballpark or stadium. And yes, the title of the column is literal, as he has season tickets in the last row of the south end zone at Soldier Field.

  Posted On Wed Apr 2 , 2008
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